Spam is Pure EvilѢ

Comment spam for me has been overwhelming the past few months, so much so that I just started finally neglecting my own blog. Fine – you (insert colorful expletive here)s win. (You have no idea how many times I had to rewrite that line in an attempt to self-censor myself. I keep thinking what co-workers might read this, or my kids someday…)

You can only post so many attempts to advertise your male performance enhancement pills and cinematography of equine fornication so much before I finally shut down all sense of reason and just abandon the thing. It gets really boring really fast having to sift through 20 or 30 spam comments just to find one legitimate one, so for a while there I just walked away for the most part.

So therefore, I’ve instituted a new comment policy. Posts after a couple of months will be automatically closed to new comments. Trackbacks seem to be much less problematic – mostly because I can’t ever recall receiving one – so I’ll leave that on for the newer posts for a while longer. But everything about a month old or so is closed to comments.

If anyone cares, here’s the SQL to blanket-close your comments from any MySQL command prompt:

update yourwordpresstablefor_posts set ping_status = replace(ping_status,'open','closed');
update yourwordpresstablefor_posts set comment_status = replace(comment_status,'open','closed');

You will of course replace yourwordpresstablefor_ with whatever prefix you chose for your WordPress blog, or maybe you don’t have a prefix in which case you can delete that part.

I am finding spam to be all consuming lately. Blog posts, email, and the good old paper mail box that I try to ignore. My postman hates me. It probably looks to him like we only come home once a week, if that. We just went on vacation for a week and I bet he didn’t notice. I am sick of looking at all of it- the junk mail, the useless offers for crap I’ll never use, and the stuff on the Internet is just ridiculous. As if I’d ever pursue that crap.

Anyway, comments are back open. If I deleted yours, sorry.

New years are great. I didn’t make any new year resolutions this year, but I already somehow find myself being more productive and taking care of crap that has been left unfinished. One of those things was paying attention to this blog and it’s spam problem. And getting back to the cathartic process of actually writing something in it.

Have a happy new year. May all your spam be light.